Dime bar.

A friend put it brilliantly when she said 'women who have a baby seem to give birth to their brain too'. Never a truer word spoken. I have become, I'd say, pretty brain dead in the 12weeks since the birth of The Boss. I actually lost my ability to speak, sentences seemingly lost or bundled up somewhere between my brain and my mouth, coming out all messed up where I ended up sounding like a bit of a div. I'd never heard of that before. But then again, I don't think it'd be the thing to tell an expectant mother 'oh by the way, you'll probably become a complete gibbering wreck for about 3months after bubba is born'. That would send most women running for the hills. Or the nearest pub.
Last week I was dog tired from The Boss waking up every hour the night before and we were both a bit sniffly. The Boss wouldn't sleep in the day, at all. It was about 5.30 in the afternoon and I thought i'd get on the bed and maybe a nice snuggle would send her off.. Dear God, what was i thinking! She screamed and screamed and screamed again. So, I got up off the bed and thought we'd take a walk but somehow managed to put my foot in the carrycot which was amongst the organized chaos on the floor, which sent me flying through the air, with babe in arms. I managed to soften the blow with my pre-broken arm on a desk. Ouch.
Living in a flat with no storage seems to create more clutter.. Or is that having a baby?? But ok, I admit it. I'm a hoarder. Hate to throw anything away me, always thinking 'oo, that'll come in handy'. I take the bits of rope off bag handles (you know the posh ones), flatten sweet wrappers, smooth the wrapping paper from gifts easing off the sellotape from the corners, flatten cereal boxes for the card, save bits of broken jewelery, in fact anything that can be re-used i will re-use it. In my mind its all been for a valuable and very green reason. For my future children to create things with.. and at last all this stuff thats cluttering up my tiny little flat will actually come in handy and will be used up. Well, until i get another bag with ropes on it..

x

New Life.. But Not as I know it..

Where do I start?? Its been a whirlwind, I've been in a bubble, my brain is mush, my baby is divine!
My goodness has it really been over 8weeks?? Thats just ridiculous.. The last 8 weeks have covered most bases emotional-wise.. I've smiled, laughed, cried, shouted, cried, wailed, giggled, cried some more and stared at the wonderment that is my little girl.. She is just perfect and it makes me cry just saying that.. At the moment anyway she is sleeping in her cot. Bloody hell, that is a mean feat. She has been sleeping in my bed since day one.. every night.
She weighed 7lb 1oz when she was pulled out of my tummy. Her temperature dropped immediately so she was wrapped in lots of hospital towels to keep her warm before she was given to me. She was howling too, like all babies do, but as soon I held her it stopped. Just like that. She stopped crying and opened those big eyes and looked at me. She was covered in vernix and all swollen from being in all that fluid for 9 whole months, but I loved her. Immediately. She just looked and started to become accustomed to life in this strange old world..
The decisions that we have to make as new parents are aplenty. We have so so many every single day. Do I follow a routine? should I stay in bed? When did I last have a shower? What should I eat? Drink? should I feed her now? Leave it a while? Does she need changing? Is that a poo? In fact what is that?! Is she tired? Blah blah blah..
You give birth to this little gift and the hospital just let you go. Without saying 'excuse me, where do you think you're going?" This is easy you think.. Thats the easy part. Back there. At the hospital. Its dead simple in there. Once you leave the hospital thats when the real work starts..
So, here begins life as an ecomum. Here life is very different from before. But i'm excited. In my weary, exhausted state I see excitement ahead, changes afoot and madness unfolding...

x

music for our small people..

Something that isn't at all new to any of us, or actually may be new to some of us (why am I so presumptuous?), is that babies in tummies react and can be known to be smarter having listened to different music. Whether its classical, folk, classic rock or disco our baby's just love music music. Alpha waves in our little babies brain are actually stimulated while listening to music, this creates a feeling of calm in the little bubba, which I'm sure you'll agree can only be a good thing.

My baby seems to like a variation on all themes.. Thank god. I hope that continues out of the womb, as I, like many of my pals like to have a boogie and I'd definitely want my baby to have a dance too.. I'm currently listening to Fan Death.. http://www.myspace.com/fandeath and there has been a bit of a reaction.. not sure if that was a get it off move or a great lets dance movement.
Another band that seems to be going down quite well is these guys.. http://www.myspace.com/empireofthesunsound the baby seems to love them. Lots of wriggles every time i play Walking On A Dream.

But really, as much as I want my baby to love all the music I love.. its pretty unlikely isn't it? i mean i hated my mums music taste.. but I love it now.. it takes a while perhaps. But we do seem to be breaking down barriers between the generations so maybe the little tyke might, just might, like my music taste.

My boyfriend got some decks the other week and wants us to play breaks to the youngan in my tum so they get used to it!

A friends baby was at a party at the weekend (no smoking inside) and was quite happy being passed around all the characters for a quick cuddle.

Its this sociable element that is just so wonderful. I know that when i was a small one I loved a party. Apart from the one where, according to my mum, i crawled under the table and pulled the plug on the record player.. can't have been a good tune.

But at the end of the day, our little babies just love a good lullaby. I started singing Humpty Dumpty but apparently that isn't a lullaby. Oh right. I didn't really know what one was, but then when i looked into it.. of course I did. What makes my bubba have even more or a wriggle is when i sing Windmill in Old Amsterdam http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fg7w49UnGA - have a look at this and it might jog your memory.. My baby has a massive wriggle at the mouse with clogs on bit. Apparently they love to listen to their mummy sing, whether you can sing in tune or not, phew.

I urge you to try it.

x

An Historic Day.

I'm smiling from ear to ear for the people of the US and the people of the world. Think that this baby was also aware that change was afoot as I was sleeping last night, or not as it so happens.. The baby in my tummy was dancing about most of the night.. keeping me awake and making me need the loo about 5 times! I feel like there is no more room for the baby and all my stuff.. my tummy feels like its stretching beyond all proportions.. Is there really 5 more weeks to go??!!

Anyway, I urge you to sign the banner for President elect Obama.
http://www.avaaz.org/en/million_messages_to_obama

Lets hope that environmental and human right changes begin before its too late..

On another note I start my anti-natal classes this week.. will let you know how that goes..

x

The Opposite Side of Saturday Morning..

I actually got up and was in the car by 9am on a sunny, chilly autumn Saturday to go to, no not another club, but to a second hand baby clothes sale. Mum and i joined the long queue of eager yummy mummy's and daddy's and prams and prams of baby's and small children. I couldn't believe what we were doing.. its like queuing up for a Next sale isn't it, why bother with all that faff for a couple of quid off?
Once we paid the NCT entry fee of a measly £1.50 and got through the big doors of the town hall, we realised why everyone did this.. It was outrageously cheap. I mean I spent £20 and pretty much got all the bubba's stuff in one swoop.. even the obligitory Christmas outfit. There was lots of pushing and shoving and being nearly at the 8months mark it wasn't the most ideal scenario for me.. but hell, I'd push through anyone for a 50p pack of bibs.

Its worrying though. For me. Is this what life has become?? A world of going to clothes sales, getting up early, having no sleep, being stupid all the time, having no money, having breakfast in the middle of the night, being a role-model for a small person... Life really is going to change.. But you know what? To be perfectly honest... I'm quite up for it. Its quite exciting. Its my chance to behave like a kid again. But obviously I'll have a firm assertive voice while I am making houses out of the living room sofa..

Rants and Stretch Marks..

I went into the maternity section of Topshop on Oxford Street the other day.. I know, its not the most eco-friendly of shops but I am poor and really want a swimsuit that isn't a) second hand or, b) hugely expensive.. So Topshop it is.. Sorry if that is letting the side down, but all I want is a bloody swimsuit! Anyway, seem to be trying to justify that to myself... but it is beautifully laid out and looks like a proper clothes shop, not a special maternity shop with rubbish clothes..

Anyway, I walked up to the changing room with my swimsuits... there is a queue of pregnant women, about 4 of us.. and a big sofa . But who is sitting on the sofa I hear you ask? Men. Yep, the HaB's. The Husbands and Boyfriends of the women trying stuff on. Now, I'm not one for kicking people out of their seats, but it drives me insane when a man doesn't get up for a pregnant woman on public transport. Strangely, its usually the women who do that. I realise that I'll be waiting in this queue a while and am exhausted, Oxford Street on a Saturday, what was I thinking?? So I ask one of the guys if they could move up so I could sit down.. I was met with a look of disqust.. This bloke said to me 'can't you sit there?' pointing to the middle and very uncomfy bit of the sofa.. What? WHAT? 'Are you serious?' I replied. To which he aggressively moved over huffing and puffing.. His lady friend then appeared, the poor poor woman. All the women in the queue and me looked at her with a serious look of.. how can I put this, yep theres only one word to use.. pity. We pitied her. What a bloke. Doesn't want to stand up for pregnant women and would probably be the kind of guy who would scream and shout at his pregnant girlfriend, never thinking of the consequences. Nice.

Rant over. I promise.

I'm now 32 weeks pregnant and still cannot believe what is happening.. My tummy is getting massive and so are the boobs.. I have been given lots of advice on stretch marks, as you will too.

Best advice? Moisturise with an oil all the time. Like EVERYDAY. It may not work for everyone. But it feels nice. My tummy looks pretty smooth but my boobs are like starfish.. quite hilarious.

Here's a couple of nice eco products I've been using:

Bio-Oil, that expensive stuff in Boots that you either have to ask for from behind the counter if you live in a dodgy part of London or is in a funny plastic box. Really it does work. Firstly forget the price, you're giving up drinking for over 9months, probably never going out and have a penchant for daytime TV, so spending £40 over this period on a nice oil is nothing. If you massage it daily, morning and night time, into your tummy, boobs and bum, not only does it feel nice for you, your baby will be getting a special little massage that they will love once they come out of your tummy. Its pretty green too .. http://www.bio-oil.info/en/environment/index

Neals Yard also do a wonderful Mothers range that I've been introduced to by a lovely friend. http://shop.nealsyardremedies.com/product/1210/Mothers_Massage_Oil
They use all natural ingredients and also smell divine. They know the oils that pregnant women can have so you don't have to worry that you're gonna pass out from too much lavender. Being 100% organic makes this a pretty good bet. For £12.99 for the massage oil, its a bit of a treat but its very relaxing for you and bubba.

Next week... we'll be having a look at nappies and other baby stuff.. and i will have gone to a real life baby sale.. oh god, what am I letting myself in for..

bye x

Birth Plan...

The end is in sight. The Birth Plan has started. Ahhhh!!

So, here are the options...
- Natural birth (the obstetrician uses the word vaginal birth.. gross) with no painkillers
- Natural birth with gas and air
- Natural Birth with epidural (an injection in your spine that kills all pain instantly)
- Natural birth with epidural, the baby pulled out using ventouse (that's a suction plastic thing that yanks the baby out by the top of the head - leaving them with cone head also called vacuum-assisted vaginal delivery) and forceps (scary looking massive metal tweezers used to pull out the baby).
- Cesarean birth.

Obviously, I wanted to follow the natural birth route - I wanted to join the birth gang, the women who have suffered for the next generation, to fulfil my job as a woman.. but due to my weird brain i had my options somewhat diminished.. It was either natural birth with epidural using those forceps and that weird ventose or Cesarean. Wow, what an array of special choices! But i thought about it... and thought about it some more and thought that if any woman had a 'choice' I doubt anyone would 'choose' to have their baby delivered with a contraption that left them with a pointy head.. surely that would only be a last option, an emergency.. not a considered choice? But a c-section was hardly a considered choice either. I met someone the other day who had been delivered by ventouse and still had a pointy head.. he is 30.

Having read some literature on the subject I found that in the UK 14 in 100,000 women die during childbirth, in developing countries that figure jumps to a terrifying 440 in 100,000 which we must agree is down to the availability of the emergency c-section in the western world. However, there are also risks with going for the full op.. risks of hemorrhage and infection etc. The doctor and the patient (that's me) has to take into account all of these factors and make a choice. So, I realised that I was not in the too posh to push category but in a completely different category of not being allowed to push on medical grounds.

That did it, I was going for the full op, the c-section. But how green can that really be?? Am I making an incredibly un-green choice?

There seems to be very little reading material on the net regarding how green medical operations are. But what I do know is that if I'm around then the baby will be leading a far greener life than if I wasn't. I will be bringing up my baby to be ethically aware and I will be ethically conscious with all the choices I have to make.

So what if I can't push the baby out of the conventional route, I'm sure there are many millions of women who do and who also use the full 5,000 nappies during the babies lifetime that take 500years each to biodegrade, don't switch their fuel suppliers, buy and throw away millions of tons of plastic toys/baby baths etc.. Where as I, ecomummy, will be living and breathing ethicalness (well, I will try my best..)

x